SONG: I'VE LOST YOU IN THE CHAOS

The night sky turns to fire

Not flames but emotion

My dark burning desire

A vast searing ocean

The morning light blinds me

Not sun but stark despair

Won’t you seek and find me

I’ve searched but you’re not there

I’ve lost you in the chaos

I’ve lost you in the storm

Sadistic fate’s betrayed us

Dangling deceitful charm

Causing our psyches harm

I’ve lost you in the chaos

Each shadow’s your shadow

Each lightning strike your eyes

Each howling wind I know

Your voice decries my lies

Your weeping drowns my soul

Your sneering ignites fear

My losing all control

Forced you to flee from here

I’ve lost you in the chaos

I’ve lost you in the storm

Sadistic fate’s betrayed us

Dangling deceitful charm

Causing our psyches harm

I’ve lost you in the chaos

I’ve lost you in the chaos

I’ve lost you in the…

I’ve lost you in…

I’ve lost you…

I’ve lost you…

I’ve lost you…

Roger Armbrust

August 28, 2018

SONG: I’M GOING DIGITAL OVER YOU

My heart feels a cramp

When I dial your amp

Seeking your stamp

Of approval

I see your icon

Come on with a frown

And then you propound

My removal

I’m going digital over you

I’ve bookmarked you Del.icio.us

Your server knows it’s true

My software’s not malicious

Don’t think my file suspicious

I’m simply in a race

To enter your database

I’m going digital over you

I’m going digital over you

Searching for your access point

network my way through

To your wireless connection

To encode my affection

Have my biometrics encrypt

Into your memory stick

I’m going digital over you

My heart feels a cramp

When I dial your amp

Seeking your stamp

Of approval

I’m going digital over you

My raw data’s in the cloud

My hard drive shows it’s true

My fiber optic cable’s

Suddenly unstable

My only hope’s to flee

Into virtual reality

I’m going digital over you

Unfriend me on Facebook

Unlink LinkedIn too

Bully my Instagram

Into cosmic spam

I’m going digital over you

Roger Armbrust

August 23, 2018

CONCEPTION

A birthday sonnet for Catherine, my daughter

Because your mother and I pulled it off,

you joined the human race, fast labor pains

pushing her from our laughing-den night of

Brandy Alexanders through sterile lanes

of St. Vincent’s to the maternity

ward. You took it from there to form your own

conceptions: life, love, and art. Certainty

of uncertainty. Faith and action. You’ve sewn

relationships with a tailor’s zealous care.

Construct your dear art like a delicate

surgeon trusting spirit’s process. Just where

you go from here, call it Muse, call it fate,

you know you don’t go alone. Conception,

after all, marries Imagination.

Roger Armbrust

August 21, 2018

SONG: THIS CAT, THIS MOUSE

This cat lives in my house
He’s got a plan I’m on to

I wish he’d catch this mouse

But I see he ain’t goin’ to

He’d rather sleep

He’d rather eat

He’d rather I

Toss him a treat

This mouse lives in my house

Near this ferocious cat

They don’t play cat and mouse

Neither brat’s into that

This mouse chews cheese

Avoids the trap

This cat’s at ease

Here in my lap

This fog of war's existed

Now for over a year

To me it just seems twisted

But these two just don’t care

I plead, but they’ve resisted

I ask you, is that fair?

I ask them, is that fair?

They stare, but they don’t care

Roger Armbrust

August 20, 2018

SONG: UNCOMPROMISING ME

Uncompromising me

She begs me to understand

But I refuse to understand

She tries to hold my hand

And so I slap her hand

Shatter my glass on the floor

Turn and storm out the door

Uncompromising me

Scandalizing me

At church she starts confession

But I teach her a lesson

Stick my head in with the priest

Shout “She screws men who’re deceased!”

I scream a profane mouthful

Flip fingers to the faithful

Turn and storm out the door

Scandalizing me

So it goes with me

Alone in my apartment

Wondering what my heart meant

By hurting her that way

By hurting me that way

I’d apologize if only…

But she won’t…I’m so lonely

And so…woe is me

Roger Armbrust

August 19, 2018

SONG: CARRY ME IN YOUR THOUGHTS

Carry me in your thoughts

Carry me in your heart

Carry me in your arms

Even when we’re apart

Carry me

Carry me

Like my thoughts carry you

Everywhere

Life’s cascading rivers

Tumble us without care

Suns always rise and fall

Leave us in darkness there

Feeling alone and lost

Fearing the unknown night

Carry me to the stars

And love’s reflective light

Carry me to the moon

Where we’re honored from Earth

Carry me through to love

Recall our promise at birth

Carry me

Carry me

Like my thoughts carry you

Everywhere

Roger Armbrust

August 19, 2018

SONGS FOR YOU

Know each time I sing a song

I’m singing the song for you

Even in a choir sing along

to God I chant to you too

When you hear me in the shower

And can’t decipher the words

Close your eyes and feel the power

Know it’s a love song you’ve heard

When I’m humming

I think of you

Guitar strumming

I’m seeing you

When I watch you brush your hair

Your brush’s rhythm’s a song

Loving lyrics whisper there

I caress them all night long

I rise at dawn, the melody

Flowing through my being

Words a loving reverie

Know when you hear me sing

I’m singing the song for you

I’m singing the song to you

Roger Armbrust

August 17, 2018

SONG: BREATHING THIS LONELY AIR

What am I doing here

Standing outside your door

Caught up in gnawing fear

Cutting me to the core

Knowing you said it’s over

How you’ve found a new lover

I’m left here to stand and stare

Breathing this lonely air

What am I doing here

Walking through cold dark rain

Seeing your face so clear

Seeing your eyes in pain

When you whispered “Go away.”

When I knew I’d never stay

The sweet night with you again

I’m left here so lost again

Breathing this lonely air

I see lightning in the distance

I hear thunder rumbling near

I still feel your resistance

What am I doing here?

What am I doing here

Stumbling into this bar

Wiping away my tears

Trying to heal my heart

With booze and fake laughter

Damning ever after

Choking in my despair

Breathing this lonely air

Cursed with this lonely air

Breathing this lonely air

Roger Armbrust

August 10, 2018

ASCENDING PINNACLE MOUNTAIN

“I love to watch sunsets from the top,” she

said, pointing as if toward stars not yet there.

I took a chance: held her hand. She led me

up West Summit Trail seeming without care,

sure of each step as if returning home,

as if oaks, pines, limestone boulders were all

old friends. She stopped, gazed smiling. “Now we’ve come

to my favorite place.” Spreading arms, she called

out to the valley, “Hello!!!” It echoed

in muffled songs like ancient memories.

Dusk turned clouds and lake to fire. Burning flowed

to and through me. Yet she seemed so at ease.

I touched her face. She kissed my lips. The lark

sang as we scurried down to beat the dark.

Roger Armbrust

August 8, 2018